Not Like Me: a Field Guide for Influencing a Diverse World.

Not Like Me helps people of faith effectively love, serve, and reach people overlooked by the church. One of the new features includes a brief article after each chapter with practical ways to apply the principles presented in that chapter.  The contributors include: Ed Stetzer, Amena Brown, Margaret Feinberg, Kevin Harney, Dr. Gerardo Marti, Kim Martinez, Lon Wong, Mark DeYmaz, Princess Zulu, Dan Kimball, and Erwin McManus (foreword).

My Amazon review:

Eric doesn’t just write about diversity, he lives it. “Not Like Me” is written as field guide for ministry and life reflecting several different voices from several different walks of life. Eric Bryant’s heart for the “outsider” is clear and his call for “insiders” to branch out is compelling.

On vacation last week I walked past a certain tree all week on the way down to the boat without thinking twice.

Then on the last day I actually looked at it.

I did a double take, unsure of what I was looking at.

At first it looked like an evergreen.

Then it looked like a….well not an evergreen.

Upon closer examination I discovered it was three trees in one.

It reminded me of lesson in leadership.

The way we lead communicates who we are.

But many of us don’t know who we are.

We’re pretending.

We’re unsure.

We’re unstable.

We’re looking to our followers to tell us who we are.

We’re impostors.

Upon closer examination, we’re three leaders in one.

We’re split and therefore so is our effectiveness.

In my new book, Your Secret Name, chapter 5 is titled Impostor Syndrome.

According to experts, 80% of us feel like we’re faking it at one time or another.

Until we answer the question-”Who am I?”…until we discover our Secret Name…we’ll struggle with living and leading as an impostor.

We’ll have moments of freedom and then run back into our chains.

We’ll have glimmers of courage and then cave into our fear-based leadership style.

Here’s a quick excerpt from Your Secret Name:

Who am I?

When trying to answer this critical question, most of us tend to look every direction, but the right one.

Sometimes we look inward–via mirrors.

Mirrors do serve a purpose: they tell us how we look. Unfortunately, they have their limitations: they can’t tell us who we are–despite how intently we peer into them. Mirrors might help us see our misplaced hair or perhaps our missing hair, but they can’t reflect our true identities.

And so other times we look outward–via people.

People do give their unsolicited impressions regarding who they think we are. We often digest their impressions and convince ourselves to be satisfied with the trivial terms they grant us. This reality fuels our addiction to affirmation, motivates us to work the long hours, and convinces us to buy the latest lotion that promises to reverse the effects of aging–because as long as the performance keeps flowing, so do the Given Names.

But the truth is only looking one direction–upward–will reveal our Secret Name. Fellow humans, no matter how loudly they speak, can never replace the voice of the Father. And mirrors, no matter how sparkling they appear, can never clear up the fog. God’s whisper alone satisfies our soul ache because God alone knows us better than we know ourselves.

Looking toward any other direction–inward or outward–for cues on who we are only accentuates the hypocrisy and duplicity that inhabits our hearts. Hypocrisy–because nobody completely bridges the chasm between what we say and how we act. Duplicity–because on some levels, we’re all impostors.

Intentionally or unintentionally, we all wear a certain set of masks. Partial disclosure isn’t bad all the time; it protects us from shame and embarrassment. But many of us wear our masks far too frequently–so much that we’ve lost touch with our potential for who God created us to be.

Excerpt taken from Your Secret Name by Kary Oberbrunner, published by Zondervan, available here via Amazon for $10.19 (ISBN:  978-0310285465).  More info www.yoursecretname.com

You won’t want to miss the Catalyst Conference this year, happening October 6-8, 2010 in Atlanta, where 13,000 young leaders will converge for the leadership experience of the year, including high-octane speakers, powerful worship, innovative programming, and an experience unlike any other.

Hear from leadership authorities including Andy Stanley, Seth Godin, TD Jakes, Craig Groeschel, Francis Chan, Beth Moore, Perry Noble, and Christine Caine, along with several innovative thinkers and practitioners like best-selling author Daniel Pink, charity: water founder Scott Harrison, Gabe Lyons, First Response Team founder Tad Agoglia, and Rani Hong, winner of the United Nations Human Rights Award.

Plus, Catalyst Labs will feature innovative thought leaders like Michael Hyatt, Pete Wilson, Mark Batterson, Anne Jackson, John Ortberg, Mike Foster, Jud Wilhite, Reggie Joiner, Jamie Tworkowski, Alan Hirsch, Gayle Haggard, Chris Hodges, Jon Acuff, Tim Elmore, Charles Lee, Chris Seay, and Phileena Heuertz, and others.

Best Rates on Catalyst tickets end this Thursday, June 24th, so register now. Call 888.334.6569 to speak to a Catalyst Concierge, or register online at www.catalystconference.com. You can use Rate Code FOB for an additional discount off your ticket price. Catalyst will sell out, so make sure and register early!

Some say we watch movies to escape our own lives.

I disagree.

I think the complete opposite is true.

I believe we watch movies to get more clarity in our own lives.

I believe we were born, hard-wired to be masters in the art of living.

As image-bearers we are destined to build our Opus just as God is building His Opus in and through us (Ephesians 2:10). 

Unfortunately, most of us are freaked out of our skin. We choose to live in fear. We crave control. We resist the unknown.

Instead, we watch movies to see others do their lives well in hopes that we can repeat it in our own.

Disagree?

Yesterday a college kid stopped and asked me a question.

Although I only met him once before, somehow he felt free enough to ask…

I got asked to be the college chaplain next Fall, but I’m already an R.A. Do you think I should do both?

Tough question.

This is the kid’s future.

My advice could really mess him up or help him.

So, what should I say?

This kid was caught in a classic scenario, one that hits us all right between the eyes on a very frequent basis.

He struggled with confidence over a decision about his future.

The reason why he struggled?

He’s unclear about what he wants in life.

I have a little phrase I often tell people.

Until you spend the difficult time discovering what you should say YES to, you’ll never know what you should say NO to.

I helped steer this young man into the right decision simply by asking him some specific questions.

I asked him what he felt God calling him to be beyond college?

I asked him if he was dating anyone?

If he wanted to get married?

What he saw himself doing full-time 5 or 10 years from now.

I asked him to map out his Dream State.

As I explained a process, a process that will take him a few weeks to do, suddenly he felt energized. (Thanks Chet Scott and Built to Lead)

I told him not to think short term, next year.

I challenged him to think about next year as a step in the process of who he ultimately wants to become.

Then I asked him if his decision about chaplain or RA will move him toward that or away from it.

Until we get a clear handle on who we want to become long-term we have no confidence on what decions we should make short-term.

So my questions to you are:

1. Do you have confidence?
2. Do you know who you are called to become?
3. Do you have your Dream State mapped out?

If the answer is no then face the facts: You’re Just Drifting.

You’re letting others tell you who you’re supposed to be.

And I’d like to ask: how’s that working for you?

Jesus’ knew his course. Do you know yours?

If not, let me know and maybe I can help.

More and more I get asked to endorse products.

Don’t be impressed…you do too.

Sometimes it’s official; I get a soon-to-be-released book in the mail.

Other times, I get asked to promo a website, idea, or movement.

After 8 years of this I finally realized a pattern…

“I believe in people not products.”

Again…you do too.

You love a certain band, director, author, or innovator.

You trust them.

You’ll buy their most recent product simply because you believe in them.

You might not even know much about their new CD, movie, book, or initiative.

That’s OK.

You still back it because you back them.

There are some people out there that I’ll get behind simply because I know them.

And likewise, I know that they’ll bring their character into their product.

There are other people that I won’t promote, regardless of how slick their idea is, simply because of who they are.

Simply put, I don’t trust these people and so I don’t trust their product.

Remember…You attract who you are and if you don’t have the goods then your goods will reflect it.

There’s nothing mean or cruel about it.

It’s simply the truth.

The MASTER himself modeled this in the Gospel of Luke.

One guy (a scribe) said he had the goods, but Jesus refused to endorse his product (or in this case his production).

Jesus knew this guy was simply blowing smoke even though he said he’d follow him anywhere. 

Yet regarding another guy, a guy who probably lacked confidence, Jesus seemed to say that he believed in him.

Jesus actually wanted this guy on his team.

Whereas he prohibited the scribe from following him, he actually told this other guy to follow him.

Jesus believed in this guy and therefore his product (or in this case his personhood). 

Too bad this guy didn’t believe in himself.

So I leave you with a couple questions:

What product are you trying to sell?

Realize you’re not selling a product, you’re selling yourself. So are you worth believing?

If not you’re not believable, what changes in your character do you need to initiate?

As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.” Jesus replied, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.” He said to another man, “Follow me.” Luke 9:57-59

A couple resources/blogs that regularly stretch my leadership muscle:

• Brad Lomenick
• Marcus Buckingham
• Chet Scott 
• Catalyst
• John Maxwell
• Built to Lead
• Michael Hyatt

Church Planters are a different breed.

I am the son of one.

Actually my father planted several.

I saw the type of effort, commitment, and heart it took from both he and my mom.

Think it’s tough to start a business in this economy?

Try starting a church…an organization (with politics) set on fighting back Hell, all with a volunteer army.

My friend Ben Arment just released a pretty sweet book that will help you on this journey.

 Church in the Making: What Makes or Breaks a New Church Before it Starts 

What if  I told you that nearly eighty percent of all new churches fail, leaving countless discouraged church planters wondering why.

Forget the hype?

Ben tells it how it is…using a backdrop of real stories from real churches and real pastors.

Don’t believe me? Read a sample for yourself.

Don’t know if you should get this book? See if you made the list: (hint - if you know someone someone on this list, be nice and buy them a copy): 

• Pastors
• Church Planters
• Church Planter’s Spouses
• District Leaders
• Aspiring Church Leaders
• Youth Pastors (you might be a church planter someday)
• Elder Boards
• Deacon Boards
• Entrepreneurs
• Church Planter mom’s

Still have some doubts?

Watch Ben convince you…(he tells a funny story about Star Wars too):

Need a leadership jolt?

Lethargic?

Or in a rut?

Those of us who’ve attended Catalyst know the outcome.

Enough content to last a few months.

The beauty of Catalyst One Day is Concentrated Leadership.

It’s like buying one of those small laundry detergent bottles that does 10,000 loads.

It may look small (or in this case = short), but it packs a powerful punch.

Best of all our blog community gets $10 off by using this code when registering (BLOG). 

What is Catalyst One Day?

On March 25, in Chicago hear Andy Stanley and Craig Groeschel uncover the secrets to creating and sustaining momentum. Learn about creating systems, environments, and entire cultures that will set the right initiatives in motion and fuel progress. Whether you need fresh insight for your staff, your church, your business, or yourself, this is an exceptional, can’t-miss opportunity.

Check out Catalyst website for more info.

.

I was shocked when I read it.

I couldn’t believe it.

You’re telling me that _____is the key indicator that I’m not ready to go to the next level in my relationship with God?

JEALOUSY?

Not adultery, immorality, or idolatry?

But jealousy?

I gave you milk to drink, not solid food; for you were not yet able to receive it. Indeed, even now you are not yet able, for you are still fleshly. For since there is jealousy and strife among you, are you not fleshly, and are you not walking like mere men? 1 Corinthians 3:2-3

Yep! The Spirit knows our hearts doesn’t He?

Because as long as another person or thing is our focus then we  exchange our joy.

Here’s the divine formula:

• jealousy = no joy = no growth with God

I will  flesh out this formula in my closing sermon illustration at Grace Church tomorrow.

• Title: Soul Food / Text: 1 Corinthians 2:14-3:3 / Summary: What’s feeding your Soul?

I’ll read an honest confession from author Rachel Held Evans about her jealousy for fellow author Anne Jackson.

It’s raw, authentic, and convicting.

Chances are you might be jealous and it’s feeding your soul rather than the Spirit.

So I leave you with a question.

What type of person or thing makes you jealous and why?

I guess I have to take off the mask first and answer the question for me.

Who?

People who are better speakers / writers / leaders than me.

Why?

Because it makes me feel insecure.

And now for You?

As I announced last month, I’ve formed a new partnership with MinisterSearch. As a result, I get the latest leads about some pretty sweet churches looking for some pretty sweet pastors. If you or a qualified person is interested in applying fill out this simple form. Here’s 11 options:

1. Adult Ministry/Small Groups in  MI
2. Student Pastor in MI
3. Pastor of Student Ministries in NJ
4. Small Groups  in IL
5. Lead Vocal Equipper in NC
6. Children’s Pastor in TN
7. Worship Pastor in TN
8. Teaching Pastor in TN
9. Director of Contemporary Worship in OH
10. High School Pastor in TX
11. Children’s Pastor in TX